Friggatriskaidekaphobia-fear of Friday the 13th

If what you think about is what you bring about, happy Friday 13th!  Do you have memorable Friday 13th thought?  What does it stir up in you?

My most memorable Friday 13th occurred exactly 3 years and 4 months ago.  I was just weeks away from facilitating a community Health and Wellness Expo and with tons to do I woke that morning with my list in hand, lightness in my spirit and with an unusually sunny and warm early spring day.

As my children piped up “oh it’s Friday the 13th” I reassured them that in my families’ native homeland, Italy, it’s good luck.  A quick visit to the Expo venue, chats with some participants even running into my Dad’s doctor on the street gave a very good feel to the day.

The events of the next hour spiraled me to a place where although over the years I have prepared for in my mind, were nothing close to living it.

A call from Dad’s caregiver at the Retirement Home had me calling his doctors office to get him in pronto and me scooting up to his residence.

My Dad was a very proud yet sensitive man.  He seldom complained about much but this morning he had been experiencing some leg pain.  Just the fact that he was sharing this discomfort was alarm enough to have me double timing it.  With a short 12 min drive way, by the time I got there, “it” was done.  Over.

His health had not been well for years.  I recall as the seasons changed year after year I always kept “those black pants” accessible, just in case.  In caring for Dad’s health for the 5 previous years I never lived day today to today with those thoughts.  Every day was glorious and it is with peace that I can smile and know that all was done that had to be done and all that was said was said.  I am grateful in knowing that on that lucky day of Friday 13th his pain ended and he now smiles with our ancestors upon this earth.

So as this Friday 13th emerges, the best thing is to wake up thinking that the day will be an incredibly lucky one rather than unlucky … otherwise it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.  There are some people that are addicted to fear, irrational fears.  They live their day to day lives with some level of fear and today just gives another reason for the inappropriate rush.

The irony of fear is, by worrying so much we jeopardize our well-being, increasing our risk for conditions including heart disease, cancer, stroke and depression, not to mention how our relationships are affected. Fear — a physical reaction to a perceived threat — is programmed into our being. When an individual feels threatened, fear revs up the metabolism in anticipation of an imminent need to defend oneself or flee.

If you want to be successful in life, health and relationships, use today to manage fear.  Susan Bond, a professional coach and intuition facilitator, offers some very simple tips:

  1. Raise your awareness.
    When I work with the clients the biggest culprit in managing fear is that they don’t even recognize that they’re fearful! It’s impossible to manage your fear if you don’t even know that its there. A powerful way to manage fear is to start by simply noticing when your fears are present. Knowing when they’re present gives you the opportunity to make a new choice.
  2. Accept it.
    Stop resisting. Stop beating yourself up for having fear. Accept that you have fears. Everyone has fear, even those who seem like they don’t. It’s important to our survival. Fear can tell us when to avoid a dangerous situation. It can also tell us when to proceed with caution. Obviously, we don’t want to get rid of something that can be so useful to us.
  3. But don’t argue with it.
    Trying to analyze or be rational with your fears will never work. It’s a bee’s nest that you don’t want to kick. Arguing with your fears is like arguing with a very good trial attorney. You’ll never win. Like attorneys, your fears are trained to win an argument. Truth be told, your fears are prepared to win at any cost. You won’t win, so don’t even try it. The best thing you can do is not to engage your fear in an argument.
  4. Put a limit on it.
    Don’t let it run wild at its own whimsy. Place a limit on how long you allow yourself to worry or be in fear. Let yourself really feel the fear. Then, put your attention on something else like how to conquer a challenge you’re facing or simply do something more pleasurable.
  5. Ask your intuition.
    Tapping into your intuition while in the midst of a fear attack may seem challenging, if not impossible. It is possible. If you can do it, you’ll learn how to manage your fears more easily. When stuck in fear, go for a walk or something physical. Then call on your intuition for answers.
  6. Remove yourself from people or situations that induce fear.
    Why put yourself in situations that only increase your fear? It may be a negative co-worker or someone who’s critical of your dreams. For me that’s means not watching the local evening news. The majority of the stories are about negative that involve, death, murder and mayhem. Discover what makes your fear worse and avoid it.
  7. Ask for help.
    If you’re really stuck in fear, it may be time to get outside help. Find others who have gone through a situation similar to the one you’re facing. Talk to a friend about your fears, rather than letting them bottle up inside you. You don’t have to go through it alone.

Another worthy listen and investment in your time is Susan Jeffers.  “FEEL THE FEAR……..AND DO IT ANYWAY”

 

 

Those who fear the darkness have no idea what the light can do.
Live in the light!

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